I am a toddler teacher. I have been seeing an unusual behavior from a child in my classroom and don't know how to deal with the situation or if I should deal with it at all. There is a child who is social with teachers/adults and will talk to children maybe once a day. All the children in the classroom play together in small groups but this child only walks around an item in big circles all day long. If we go outside the child will begin to walk around a certain toy out there as well. It's very strange and I have never seen this behavior before. Is this normal? I spoke to the parents and they think it's the child's personality and that the child is shy. I don't believe so because the child doesn't play by himself either so it doesn't make sense that he is shy. Has anyone ever had a child with the same actions? The child speaks very well and is very smart.
You owe it to these parents to urge them to have their son evaluated. Ask them to talk to their pediatrician about this specific behavior. It may only occur in school, and the parents may not see it at home, so they need you to tell them about the unique behavior not found with other children his age. There are also free options that will help evaluate this child. If he is under 3 years old, have the parents call the Orange County Regional Center and describe the behavior and ask for guidance. They will probably also ask for a doctor’s evaluation, but they can give assessments and offer suggestions as well. If he is over 3 years old, have them contact their local school district. The school districts will assess children as young as 3 and offer services if he qualifies for any. You may need to put your concerns in writing, simply describing the behavior and your concerns along with your recommendation that they seek the advice of their doctor.
3 comments:
I wanted (hopefully) add some insight to your reply to the "toddler teacher" letter that appeared April 11th. Within seconds of reading the letter, my husband came to me and asked "tell me what you think..."
First, my pediatrician told me when I considered pre-school for my now teenaged children that up to the age of 4, children really don't play "with" each other. You can sit them side by side and they'll play, but most likely they're simply playing side by side, without true "socialization."
On the other hand, my now 14-year old son had virtually the same issue going on not so many years ago. My son has Asperger's Syndrome, diagnosed just at 3 years ago.
Generally, Asperger Syndrome is defined as an "Autism Spectrum Disorder" - usually "Aspies" are high functioning, very bright, articulate individuals who have difficulty fitting in socially. Parents can Google "little professor's syndrome" for additional info. A pediatrician worth his/her salt should be able to identify other key Asperger's attributes (walking on tip-toes, very sensitive hearing, poor eye-contact).
On a positive note - and it's really all positive - if this little critter has Asperger's, his parents shouldn't worry about a "label" when it comes to disclosing the condition. I did at first, but quickly learned that communication with school administrators, staff and teachers is essential to the child's sense of safety, security, and confidence, not to mention their success in life. My son will attend high school in the fall, meaning that he's survived (almost there!) the dreaded middle school years. I absolutely believe that this feat was accomplished (straight A's throughout) only due to the collaboration with the school's principal and teachers. It's been an amazing ride for my son.
In addition, my son participates in an amazing program - very economical - currently housed at CHOC that has helped build his sense of self-discipline, confidence, and physical coordination - all of which were minimal (because he was taunted and bullied daily for the very same behavior the toddler discussed in the letter exhibited) until just 3 years ago. Oh, and he also plays Club water polo (although his on-land physical agility is deficient) and will play on the high school team starting in June.
I could go on and on, but I just thought this limited info might be helpful for the pre-school teacher and parents of the little boy.
Parents and teachers write to me asking questions and seeking guidance. Sometimes another parents has the best advice. Your story will strike a chord with other parents. The teacher wrote in last week, and I do not have a link to the parents, but perhaps they will read your follow up.
On a side note, you mentioned first hearing that children don’t really play together up to the age of 4. In the toddler years, children do practice what is called parallel play, where they play alongside peers, but not necessarily with them. By 4, kids really are taking part in cooperative play and enjoying peers. If this is not the case, it would always be a good idea to check in with the pediatrician and the teachers. The teacher who wrote in described a child doing ritualistic behaviors, and these do not qualify as examples of parallel play, so this would also be a time to check in with the doctor to describe what is happening. As you found, when teachers and parents are on the same team, children really benefit.
Contact the writer by visiting her website at http://www.goasktheteacher.com or email her directly at southocteacher@yahoo.com
My take is that asperger's syndrome during the early stages should be attended and no parent should ever forget that.
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